After a whirlwind 48+ hours in Las Vegas, I thought that it would be fun and crucial to share some of my favorite tips, observations, experiences, and photos with you.  Enjoy!

1)  Flying Delta?  Not checking your luggage?  If you're checking in to your flight online, I highly recommend paying the extra $19 to a) upgrade to 'Zone 1' boarding, and b) have access to WiFi.  Not only will you get to board the plane first (behind old people, folks w/ children, etc. and First Class) but, because you're one of the first passengers, overhead storage bins will be virtually empty!  And, if you've never experienced it, WiFi at 35,000 feet is beyond cool and makes the dreaded flight time breeze by.  

2)  The taxi line at McCarren International Airport is as long and tangled as an accordion.  If you have no time to spare and/or plenty of money to burn, then do yourself - and your blood pressure - a favor and hire a private car to come and fetch you upon arrival. 

3)  And, speaking of taxis, make sure to have cash on-hand for payment.  While some vehicles now accept credit cards, you will be charged a hefty $3 fee just for swiping your plastic.  No thanks!

4)  Hate smoke?  Well, you're out of luck - because cigarette puffing is EVERYWHERE in Las Vegas.  Either deal with it or choose a different destination.  Seriously. 

5)  Guys:  If you DO NOT want to get laid, then make sure to wear jean shorts AND mandals.  At the same time. 

6)  If you need even more proof that the Kardashian's have taken over the world, then head over to The Mirage for confirmation.  Sigh.  Eye roll.  Gag.

7)  Curious to see the grand canal and the shops at The Venetian?  Fine, take a peak at the charming gondoliers - snap a photo or two - then do a pivot and get the hell out of there.  If you're not in to shit-shows and gnarly crowds, I highly recommend The Forum Shops at Caesar's Palace.   

8)  And, while we're on the topic of shopping:  If you absolutely DO NOT want to receive good service whilst shopping - especially at high-end indoor malls - then make sure and come dressed like this:

9)  If you think that 'people watching' in NYC or Venice Beach is outrageous, you ain't seen NOTHIN' yet.  Vegas, hands down, takes the blue ribbon for 'best people watching.'  Of all time.

10)  Ladies, a word of advice:  You may want to reconsider traveling to Vegas with your man.  Trust me, no matter how amazing you think you look - there is another chick(s) who's 100x hotter.  And, believe me, he will *not* be able to stop staring.  I couldn't, either.

11)  In some aspects, Las Vegas seems like a mini-Manhattan.  There are so many NYC outposts of restaurants, bars, and boutiques.  Some examples include:  Scoop, Intermix, Tao, 1Oak, Max Brenner, Blue Ribbon Sushi Bar & Grill...

12)  And, just like NYC, many restaurants in Las Vegas are outrageously expensive.  Actually, the prices in Vegas are even *more* offensive.  Be very mindful of food/drink menus and order wisely.  Mom, my Vegas travel buddy, and I would typically order a couple of appetizers and split one entree.  It was a great system that saved us both cash and calories!

13)  And speaking of restaurants: 

~ We enjoyed lunch at Stripburger, which is located on the outside of the Fashion Show Mall complex, and across the street from the Wynn.  How can you go wrong with outdoor seating - great cocktails - burgers cooked to your liking - fantastic fries, onion rings, fried pickles - and all of the ranch dressing that your heart desires?  

~ For dinner, we headed to Emeril Lagasse's Delmonico's Steakhouse, located within the brutally annoying/overwhelming/panic attack-inducing Grand Canal Shoppes at The Venetian.  Mom said it best, "This entire hotel complex looks as though its architects and interior designers had high hopes, but ran out of money towards the end of construction."  The same observation could be said of the restaurant:  While you gaze up at beautifully vaulted, arched ceilings, the column to your left is squared-off sheetrock.  Blech.

Our dinner at Delmonico's Steakhouse was mediocre, at best.  Here are some of the key reasons that I would not return:

• Mom's margarita was overly salty and sour (even for me, a salt/sour whore).  When we informed our server, he looked at us like we each had 10 heads.  While he did offer to have it remade, he sure as hell did not seem sympathetic or pleased.  We saw him take Mom's drink over to his manager and explain the situation with less-than-thrilled facial expressions and hand gestures.   
• Drinks, round 2:  Our server got heated when, upon tasting the first bottle of red wine, I asked that we switch to something else (hey, it tasted carbonated and extremely sour). 
• The iceberg lettuce leaves in the "Petite Iceberg Lettuce Wedges" salad were limp.
• There was not enough burrata cheese in the "Vine Ripened Tomato Salad."  
• Our filet was cooked "medium rare," instead of our requested "medium."  But, by this point in the meal, we were too exhausted to correct the order.

The one item on Delmonico's menu that I *would* return for?  The ridiculously rich, perfectly-scalloped and garlic-y "Potato Gratin" that arrived bubbling over the brim of a cast iron skillet.  I'm drooling just writing about it...

~ The award for 'worst service of the entire trip' goes to La Cave, a wine/tapas restaurant at the Wynn.  After returning to the hotel from our 7pm "The Beatles Love" performance, Mom and I were hungry.  We didn't want a full, elaborate meal; we were simply hoping to enjoy some heavy snacks and a great glass of wine.  

We arrived at La Cave at approximately 10:10pm, and were greeted by two hostesses.  "Hi.  Are you joining us for dinner or just drinks?"  Both.  "OK, we have a spot open at the bar.  You can squeeze in another chair, or we can seat you at a table.  But just an FYI:  We're closing our kitchen in 10-minutes, so we're having last-call."  How would *another* chair fit at the bar?  There's not enough room.  OK, we'll take a table, then.  "If you sit at the bar, then there isn't a 'last call,' you know."  Oh, so we can order food/drink at the bar w/out being rushed?  "No, you can only order food for another 10-minutes.  Even at the bar.  It's 'last call.'"  Huh?  I'm confused.  But you just said...never mind.  We'll take a table, please.  

The hostess seats us in front of an open terrace door, gushing the interior space with wind drafts.  I ask if we can, instead, be seated outdoors.  "There's not a table open."  The beotch was lying - I saw plenty of space out there - but I didn't have it in me to punch her in the face fight. 

Mom and I eventually moved ourselves to another table.  Since we ended up waiting for an unreasonable amount of time, I had to excuse myself and advise an employee that we'd like to see menus and, eventually, order food/drink.  We were served by a kind man who informed us that the kitchen did not close until 11pm.  Interesting point, since the HOstess lied to our faces and said that the "kitchen closes in 10-minutes (which would have been 10:20)."  

La Cave was a 'fail' on so many levels.  Our cheese platter was accompanied by crostini - Mom's wine was $17/glass - my margarita sucked - and the service was beyond heinous.   

14)  And speaking of the Wynn: 

Despite our shiteous experience at La Cave, Mom and I thoroughly enjoyed this gorgeous hotel.  Never, in my life, have I stayed in a more beautifully appointed and furnished room.  Every detail, down to the toiletry bottles being 'pop top' as opposed to 'screw top,' was incredibly well thought-out and delivered. 

Here are some of my favorite aspects of the hotel:

• Our room was 640 square feet.  That's larger than my apartment in NYC!
  • *Our bathroom contained a separate tub and shower, plus 2 sinks!
  • *Lights and curtains were powered electronically, via a digital screen on the wall.
• Unlike other hotels - especially other hotels in the immediate vicinity - every employee knew where each restaurant/shop/nightclub/pool was located on the property.  The staff was incredibly knowledgeable and friendly.
• I never felt like I was at a Sandals resort or aboard a Carnival Cruise ship (while at the hotel):  You can use your imagination/make your own assessment of what I'm talking about...
• The shops, while completely outrageous and extravagant, were fun to browse in and window-shop.

...

Mom and I had a fantastic "girl's weekend" in Vegas!  The people watching, weather, shopping, and hotel-hopping was priceless.  As was the 1x1 time that we got to spend together. 

I cannot wait to return to 'Sin City,' especially knowing all that I know now.  Do you have any tips or favorite experiences in Las Vegas?  Holla'!

~~~

Until we eat again,

The Lunch Belle